Millie Bobby Brown Struggled To Find Her Own Identity While Growing Up In The Spotlight: 'Who Am I Meant To Be?'
Millie Bobby Brown wasn't even a teenager when she was nominated at the Emmys for her breakout role in Stranger Things, but with her success came just as much personal struggle.
For the 18-year-old star, the gig started out on a high note. "At first it was really fun. And then I was like, ‘Gosh, I could really do things with this. I could really change the world with this,’" she recalled in a recent interview. "There was something about acting that made me feel powerful, impactful, and like I could inspire people."
As her fame heightened and she grew up, she began finding and expressing her own identity instead of that of her supernatural Netflix character, Eleven — but the change wasn't well received with some.
"It’s really hard to be hated on when you don’t know who you are yet," explained the actress. "So it’s like, ‘What do they hate about me? ’Cause I don’t know who I am.’"
"It’s almost like, ‘OK, I’m going to try being this today.’ [And then they say], ‘Oh, no, I hate that.’ ‘OK. Forget that. I’m going to try being this today.’ ‘Oh, my God! I hate when you do that.’ Then you just start shutting down because you’re like, ‘Who am I meant to be? Who do they need me to be for them?’" said the British beauty. "Then I started to grow more, and my family and friends really helped. It helped to be able to understand that I don’t need to be anything they said that I need to be. I just have to develop within myself. That’s what I did."
Brown revealed she's currently studying human services via online classes at Purdue University, and though she's still figuring out who she is, she's become more comfortable in embracing her individuality.
"Ultimately, all I wanted to do within my career is help young girls and young people out there know that I, too, go through things," said the teen. "I’m not this perfect person that is selling skin-care products and [who is] in Stranger Things. I absolutely have made wrong decisions."
The star gave the scoop to Allure.